Singapore

“Don’t think of Singapore as a country…think of it as a business,” I was told over a Tiger beer in Clarke Quay (Singapore’s riverfront entertainment district that had all the feeling and appearance of a revamped and modern EPCOT Center).

Singapore is an interesting place. That’s for sure. True to reputation its extremely clean, extremely well organized, extremely modern, and extremely pricey. Its not one of those places you visit where your camera can’t stay hidden for long. Its the opposite. There isn’t a great deal from a visual standpoint to illicit those ‘ooohs and aaahs’ that inevitably come from beach and mountain and temple. Its a city. A tiny city. A clean city. An ultra-western city. An ultra-wealthy city. But a city all the same.

What I found more intriguing than Singapore’s facade were the discussions I shared over beers with members of its significant ex-pat community.

• You want to buy a posh sports car? Tack on 150% tax to that imported BMW. That $30,000 whip in the States becomes $75,000, so when you see that 735i or Maserati cruising the street you know the driver is part of that 5% uber wealthy upper class.
• Rent on a $1,800,000SGD ($1,260,000usd) suburban apartment complete with the 20 minute commute to the CBD? Try extremely reasonable given what its mirror in NYC would fetch.
• You’re a young couple and have your first child….try an all-in-cost per month for a full time live-in nanny of $700usd. That’s room, food, and salary for an ultra-efficient 24/7 Filipino do-it-all (its up to the employer whether they give Sunday off or not). Now I haven’t had the pleasure of shopping for a nanny in NYC recently, but I imagine that figure is nowhere remotely close to being even in the same ballpark as $700usd. So newly minted parents can find themselves both hitting the town into the wee hours on a Saturday. Both careers can continue uninterrupted with the home front under control. I thought that was a real game changer.
• It is a shock when your $2.00usd Bintang in Indonesia is replaced with a $6.00usd Tiger in Singapore. Makes a backpack eager to find the Malaysian border and favorable exchange rates again.
• Taxes? A 40% tax bracket in the States melts to around 20%. Game changer.
• The government’s 10-year business plan requires the construction of Asia’s most ambitious casino project (take that Macau). Where to build? Oh, hows about just filling in one of the city’s major downtown marinas. Presto-change-o…. newly created prime waterfront real estate. No loop holes to navigate. You’re the Singapore government. You already own it.

• If you are caught riding your bicycle up/down the handicap ramp leading to an underpass…its a $1,000SGD fine. Says it right there on the wall. Can’t miss it. Ok, most people can’t miss it. “Hey Devin, you might want to walk your bike…” So you think, aren’t they maybe getting a bit excessive here? Then you hit the bars and learn that prostitution is rampant and everywhere and apparently condoned by the government. Maybe not openly condoned, but they certainly look the other way. So you’re telling us that spitting on the sidewalk is a caneble (?) offense , jay-walking can get you a stint in the joint, smoking a joint will definitely find you the noose, but the far-from-discreet sex trade isn’t an issue? Again, interesting.

Overall Singapore is an interesting visit. A couple of days is plenty, unless you’re trading 3rd world overnight bus trips for free lodging in 1st world million dollar apartments, in which case 96 hours does nicely.

And yes we did imbibe in the obligatory Singapore Sling at its birthplace: The Long Bar at the Raffles Hotel. The signature cocktail, I thought, was pretty representative of Singapore itself:

Easy on the eyes, easy going down, painful on the wallet.